“Spelling Tests Disguised as Video Games Are Still Just Spelling Tests.”
An XboxHornet Review by Mercedes.
There is something I do not understand, something profound that affects me at an intimate level. Why do game developers take an idea that by itself is simply categorized as “work” and call it a game? Sure, if there is absolutely nothing to do around the house, and I mean absolutely nothing, I miiight work on my spelling. But if you dress it up with music and a pretty interface and then call it a “game”, I’m going to karate chop you in the throat.
Don’t cry foul on me, dammit. I understand that you can take a simple task like spelling and make it fun by introducing, oh I don’t know, a spelling driving game, a spelling adventure game or a spelling role-playing game. Hell, I even played a math adventure game and all those games were awesome! Bring those back! You can’t just take simple spelling, add a timer and proclaim “Voila! My Masterpiece is finished!”. You bastards, the only reason I continued to play on after I figured out I was accidentally studying for this Friday’s spelling bee was because my editor would have my balls in a basket if all I wrote was “Don’t want.”
The developers of Brain Jump seem to think that by adding calm music (to be fair, it’s actually quite nice), I’ll be distracted long enough to complete activities I was doing during grade school. I hated grade school. No more nap times and milk or cookies, just stinky mouthed teachers forcing me to learn. Way to drag out bad memories, Brain Jump. You “get” to do activities like arithmetic, geometry shape names, shape matching, memory blocks and, my-favorite-activity-that-I-can-do-for-free-with-another-human-being: Hangman. Joy.
The second game, err..I mean “activity”, Brain Jump 2, switches up the exciting formula from the first game with trivia! You know, just like Microsoft’s cancelled 1 vs. 100 and the other trivia game You Don’t Know Jack, except this game lacks human interaction and humor. So it’s basically not at all like those games and about as fun as being awakened at 3 am by a screaming infant. Except Brain Jump 2 also has really nice music. I had more fun writing this review and thinking of insults than playing Brain Jump. Don’t want.
Game Score: 2/10. This isn’t a game. It’s a mental exercise. With nice music.
Download a free demo of Brain Jump here.
Download a free demo of Brain Jump 2 here.